The Art of Small Talk
There are so many people who squirm and wriggle at the thought of small talk. Little do they know how much power lies in the art of it. They hate the concept of carrying on mildly (at best) entertaining conversations. Those conversations always seem to feel empty, shallow, and sometimes disingenuous, but if done correctly, they can be life-changing.
Networking is the key to success. Every major CEO, coach, or thought leader gives the same advice when someone is looking to break into their field, “it’s about who you know.” How do you get to know these so-called people who will land you your dream job or opportunity? The answer is simple yet dreadful to most, small talk.
Learning how to engage in meaningful and inspiring small talk will unlock the door to greatness, however you define it. First, you must understand and accept that anyone can teach you something. So approach every conversation with an open mind and a willingness to learn. That should be the easy part. The next step is saying something to start a dialogue beyond the typical exchange of pleasantries.
An easy first step to creating meaningful conversation is with a compliment. It puts the other person at ease and creates a welcoming environment. Attempt to compliment on something beyond their looks, especially if it is a person you should know, like a C-Suite executive of a company in your field. Try a compliment like, “I truly enjoyed your presentation on [insert topic here].” People love to talk about themselves, so give them the chance to do that.
The next step in creating purposeful connections is to ask questions. Ask open-ended questions surrounding popular topics in your field or the one you aspire to be in. You can use the compliment suggestion and a follow-up question to keep the conversation flowing. From the previous example, once the person responds to your compliment about their presentation, you could ask, “what inspired you to share this topic?”
A surefire way to become a master of small talk is to learn how to become a great listener and interviewer. Small talk is a delicate dance that takes precision and practice. The only way to become great at it is to engage in it frequently and as often as possible. The more you do it, the less daunting it becomes. Before you know it, you have created an extensive network of friends, co-workers, business partners, and mentors.
